I will write for myself, to alleviate the apprehension in the depth of my soul.

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Rule #120: Sometimes, having lesser, we found more.

 photo IMG_0663__zps288302b7.jpg

It is beautiful that we found each other again in the most ironic of ways. We lost each other to misunderstandings and found each other. We lost each other in love, to distance. And here we are, after 6 years, finding each other again.
It is beyond me what this life has in store for us.

♡ ♡ ♡
Nadiah Latiff

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Rule #119: Sometimes your best is just not good enough. Suck it up and keep trying.

 photo 392401_10151128636280822_150572414_n________zps2d2919d4.jpg

First post of 2013 and it is already March. I actually wrote an entry about my thoughts on 2012 on January, but I haven't posted it yet. I don't know if you guys are still interested to know- i might still post it though. Anyways, as usual, I had been extremely busy with school. I know some would say it's just an "excuse" not to attend social gatherings but really, the amount of projects that were given for my foundation year were just insane. Despite that, I did feel tempted to write, again and again.

Some days I would feel like I am losing my mind. It gets really exhausting, you know? Constantly battling with my emotions, the standards that I have set myself and the values that i hold in life, to be liked and accepted in school, especially the lecturers because they are the ones who will grade us at the end of the day. Honestly i think I do fit in- not saying this in a boastful manner- but I have always hated the politics. It's always going around and you can't trust anyone. That's reason why i don't choose to socialise much- also the reason why many thought I was actually... arrogant. I don't blame them for not taking the time to get to know me personally and choose to be judgemental instead. I am to be blamed for not taking the effort to have casual conversations with people in school. No one but myself. My negativity. My pessimistic tendencies.

At times I don't know how to deal with the rejection of my art work which I have put in so much time and energy. I would be shaken to my core, finding myself being challenged internally, mentally, emotionally. For most people that I know of, they would usually say, "No I don't care about what they think. This is my art work. Not theirs." I do say that at times because some lecturers are just bias in some ways or another, but who i am kidding? Honestly, i DO care because in the future, you have to make a living and if you're in the art industry, it IS about impressing your clients. Nevertheless, I do work hard to pick myself up and find that silver lining.

I know, overtly aware, I had been whining like a spoiled brat for the past few weeks because I couldn't keep up. I do give thanks to people who have listened to me. Suffice to say, term 3 is over and I can have my long rest now. Things that have happened in my life- not only school- make me realize how extremely sheltered my life really is, truly is.

 photo 246492_10151128635620822_38234504_n_zps102f41ce.jpg
 photo 402945_10151128613710822_493089258_n_zps313ef318.jpg
 photo 183253_10151128612020822_709912912_n_zps13b17395.jpg
 photo 303979_10151128618960822_1137984433_n_zps68918d07.jpg
 photo 393306_10151128618550822_572748717_n_zps2d368eb9.jpg
 photo 248401_10151128615965822_813022619_n_zpsa221a8a3.jpg
 photo 260158_10151128637265822_837810499_n_zps2619c776.jpg

I will definitely miss my foundation year. Thank you, VSN1/2A peeps;)

♡ ♡ ♡
Nadiah Latiff