Rule #30: Sometimes we have to lose something precious in order to gain something priceless.

Last Friday I went shopping with my boyfriend @ ion to find his outfit for his dinner&dance @ MBS on monday. It was very last minute so we just had to pick the best that we've seen that day but i'm delighted that we found what he needed most and it's quite affordable. But i still wonder why the hell did his company have a d&d on a monday? I find it so ridiculous, furthermore it was public holiday. Good thing it's at mbs though, sounded so grand. I just came by to take his photo because he was extra handsome that day. I was the one who told him to wear a bow because i thought it looks cuter than just a tie :) hehe!









Coat, H&M | Shoulder bag, H&M | Nude wedges, Local | Singlet, Guess | Jeans, Topshop

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If you have not figured out by now I do enjoy being alone at times.. Underline on the last two words. the problem with me is, i really dont like to be with people all the time I find comfort in being alone. I distance myself from all the clutter and then I am at a point where all my worries go away. Oh, sweet sweet solitude….

My emotions are more intense than you can imagine because I spend so much time reflecting on them. But I guess I prefer my own company because I don't have to hear anyone else's voice but my own. I don't have to deal with any other sounds except the ones that I voluntarily make and I don’t have to worry about anyone else but myself. The only input that actually matters is my own. It feels like I'm astral projecting myself into the stars yet at the same time I’m delving into my subconscious mind. I ask myself questions I have never asked before, challenging my mind to come up with some reasonable answer. It’s almost like a journey across the very planes of existence.

I've been having all these rather trenchant thoughts. I think sometimes, in the midst of all that chaos that is social media, you just need to pull back and get away from it all. Mainly due to the fact that I've been reading my twitter timeline (and other forms of communication) this past weeks and I've come to realize that I am disappointed in so many people. People, whom I thought had sense, really don't. People who ache for attention, they're willing to go to the lowest of lows to get it. People, who have so much hate in others, try so hard to make everybody else feel the same way too. People, who have this constant need to impress others, need for compliments. Why?

It's times like these that a favorite Henry Rollins quote comes to mind:
"Why do you think the old stories tell of men who set out on great journeys to impress the gods? Because trying to impress people just isn't worth the time and effort."

The other day somebody randomly asked me about my circle of friends because he said that I’m a social butterfly. But you know, it got me thinking. Lately, its always been like this. It seems like I don't have any new friends, just new acquaintances. Having a circle requires people. Real people. I don’t have that. Joining a clique might seem easy for me but to be honest, it’s tough to keep it together strongly. It feels like you always have to prove yourself worthy for a certain time. Before the people accept you for who you really are, it feels like you need to stop a certain habits and create new ones, to continue being part of that group. Of course that means more gossiping, yadda yadda. So having a clique is a huge no for me because I’m so over it. Pardon my delusions of persecution. Or pride.

Just cut me some slack. While you’re looking for friends I'm going on an adventure through time and space through the corridors of my subconscious. Have a great day ahead, my beauties! xx